It is that time of year again. The time where reflection, resolutions, and goals abound.
This time last year I was in Mangochi, Malawi bringing in the New Year with 42 of my closest friends, toasting with a glass of amarula while overlooking Lake Malawi at hostel that had a very strong and distinct smell of dead fish.
The last year has been an adventure, to say the least. Yes, the places I lived over the last year brought adventure, but I think living an adventure is a choice made, a decision to live boldly and freely wherever you are, regardless of where in the world you are.
I distinctly remember writing a blog (Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Chocolate) about this time last year, pledging to embrace each and every moment that life brought me.
This time last year was hard. I missed home, family, and conveniences of life in America.
Now, this year, I miss those sweet moments in the bush of Africa, dirty little hands reaching for mine, how normal it is to pick up and hold a stranger’s child. I miss dinners from the night market in Chang Mai, the sweet man I always bought my pad thai from. And so so many other things. Mostly, I miss the people. My squad, the friends I made in each country. So much, it hurts.
Of course, I am thankful to be in America, celebrating the holidays with my family.
I’m realizing, all over again, that our hearts continually long for other, for what we believe is “more” or “better” in the moment, but are never fully satisfied.
I’ve learned the lesson of being fully present, fully alive in each moment in part. This year I hope to learn it in full. And for those of you who have followed my journey over the past year and a half, especially for those of you who responded to my questions of ‘how are you?’ ‘what exciting things happened to you this year?’ with ‘well, I didn’t do anything like you, I just here.’ I hope you realize that you too are on an adventure and it doesn’t need to take place in a foreign country for it to be so.
So here’s to embracing each and every little moment and living fully in 2016!
And just for funsies, here is an excerpt from the blog I wrote last year.
“I struggle to be exactly where I am and I think that the next phase of life will bring the contentment and joy that I desire.
In Zambia I read Annie’s favorite book, Cold Tangerines. This past month I found myself re-reading several of the chapters because they are full of so much truth.
This is one of my favorite quotes.
“That’s what I want my life to be, like a well-loved gift. I think life, just life, just breathing in and out, is a great gift. God gives us something amazing when He gives us life, and I want to live with gratitude. I want to live in such a way that shows I appreciate the gift.”
That is what I want and how I want to live my life. I want my life to reflect my thankfulness for this amazing gift.
I want to live with joy and thankfulness and celebration.
As church continued that day my team got up to sing and I felt the Spirit stirring. As Malawians shouted out and cheered as we sang “there is power in the name of Jesus to break every chain”, I felt the Lord whisper, “these are the moments you are here for.” And I heard those words reverberate through the rest of that day.
These are the moments you are here for.
Painting little girls’ nails… and the boys too when they keep pushing through the line, eager to have their dirty little nails painted pink too. Enjoying riding to town with the windows down and the cool breeze in my face. Rejoicing when we find a stash of Cadbury chocolate bars in the grocery store when we thought we cleared the store out weeks ago. Not feeling guilty about eating an entire container of Cikonella (Malawi nutella) in two days because, hey, it’s Christmas. Playing hand clapping games until my arms are sore. Playing fishbowl with the team and being able to laugh at myself when I call Easter Island “Easter Egg Heads”. Jamming to Disney music while waiting for dinner. Being thankful for the meal of rice and greens that we have had for approximately sixty other meals this month. Taking a million selfies with the kids…
I want to celebrate the little moments of life and not save it for the “big and important” things. Because ‘the greatest honor we can give Almighty God is to live gladly because of His love.’ Julian of Norwich.”
Also, just as an update. My term at the Center for Global Action is complete and I am back in Florida for two months before continuing training in Wisconsin. So to all of my Florida people, let’s be friends!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, friends and fam!
